I met Petre a year ago, when I started looking for someone to build my website from scratch, but contain all my materials from the free platform, hundreds of recipes and articles. A Sisyphean job (I realized this much later) which he did without complaint. If you are now reading this article on this site it is the credit of two people: mine and his. He has immense patience and an equally great pleasure in seeing quality things come out of his hands and mind. If you want to work with him, you can send him an email at pe3ry6us@gmail.com or you can send him a message on whatsapp at the number 0725 388 786.
Petre is 47 years old. He’s an alcoholic and he’s not ashamed to admit it. Although WHO has been saying for more than 60 years that alcoholism is a disease, and not a vice, in Romania it is not recognized as such. If alcoholics knew they were sick, as Petre did, it would be much easier for them to treat and heal. Just as celiac disease is treated by completely and definitively giving up gluten, so alcoholism is treated by completely and definitively giving up alcohol. Just as an autoimmune disease affects the whole body over time, so does alcoholism. Alcoholism is a chronic disease, as is any autoimmune disease. The more of us realize this, and the more alcoholics are not stigmatized, the more they will have a chance at a normal life.
Hi😊. Who is Petre?
Howdy! My name is Petre and I am an alcoholic. I’m abstinent now, I have 5 years this very month😊. I’ve had atypical migraine since childhood, and Arnold’s neuralgia. COPD (chronic obstructive pulmonary disease), polydiscopathy, scoliosis and kyphosis are other conditions that demand tribute from me and with which, regardless of my desire, I have to share my life….
My passions are in the IT field, I’ve been fixing/building and working on computers since Windows95 came out😊. Wow, for almost 30 years… I’ve been building websites, helping people with the technical side of the online environment. I flirt with NFTs and volunteer.
I love the mountain, personal development, psychology, spirituality. And, of course, online games😊.
When did your diseases started? Which were your first symptoms? How did you get to a diagnosis?
This disease, alcoholism, has a major handicap in Romania. It is not considered a disease, but only a vice. Although the World Health Organization in the definition given for more than 60 years says exactly the opposite: Alcoholism is a disease, not a vice. It is a progressive, physical and mental illness, and potentially fatal. In our country it is treated by both sides in a profoundly superficial way. Society points the finger at alcoholics as if they are the only ones “to blame” for being alcoholics, which is not the case at all. And on the side of alcoholics, feelings of shame and guilt prevail. Shame for what they do in consumption and guilt that they can’t stop. Adequate diagnosis for alcoholism in Romania does not exist even now. And no really adequate treatment.
For me, there were genetic prerequisites, and I think the disease existed latently and grew with me. Symptoms have always existed, only the state of denial makes you NOT to act. I gave up alcohol 5 years ago.
COPD, discovered and diagnosed during abstinence, also increased over time. I smoked in my youth, and I ignored that I couldn’t breathe properly for a long time.
Polydiscopathies are of a mechanical nature, developed during the period of intense physical work, and the pains appeared when the effect of alcohol in the body ceased. The diagnosis came quickly, the spinal defects are visible to the naked eye.
As for migraines, my “wonderful” headaches, I’ve had them for as long as I can remember. I live with them and they will be my partners until the end of my life…
What treatment were you prescribed? Did it help you?
For alcoholism, the only treatment that really works is abstinence. That’s it.
For the migraine that has held my hand all my life, I have tried my mother’s medicines since childhood. Algocalmin, antineuralgic, paracetamol. I took a lot of them. Then in adult life I tested all the pharmacy… Nothing really helped me… Pains come and go as they please. Even now.
With COPD, I can manage most situations with prescribed medication. So far.
And on the polydiscopathy side, I take the same classic anti-inflammatory drugs, as needed. It helps to some extent.
Did you also try a diet? Did it help?
I didn’t try it consciously at first. But somehow it came naturally.
For many years my diet consisted mostly of processed food, with a lot of meat and eaten on the run, at inappropriate hours watered down and abundantly with the unfailing alcohol. I reached a weight of over 100 Kg.
The diet for me meant a total change in eating style.
Now I eat much less meat, I added more fish, I only eat food cooked at home, with lots of vegetables and fruits, and my favorite has become hummus😊. I eat at regular times, without any processed food. As for weight, I reached 78 kg, within a more than acceptable limit. In conclusion, YES, the food diet helped me a lot.
What else, aside from medication and diet, did you try and found it working for you?
In the first months after giving up alcohol, the most complicated aspects are withdrawal and abstinence. I made no exception to the rule…
I am grateful to my wife who simply, in a terrible cold, held my hand and for the first time I entered a small room inside the Obregia hospital, where an Alcoholics Anonymous group still operates. And then I am grateful to the group that literally did miracles for me. And I think that makes a BIG difference. The support group. Not the drugs, not the “will” as society often says, not the promises you make to yourself or others that help you. It’s only when you see with your own eyes people who have a longer or shorter period without alcohol that you start to hope that it will be possible for you too.
Only when you begin to understand that a total lifestyle change is needed and see it applied to other people do you have the courage to try. And everything that followed started from here…
Since then, for 5 years, I have tried many remedies to help me. I stayed constant with certain practices, and integrated them as habits.
I do physical therapy and radio taiso exercises as often as I can to stimulate the vagus nerve. Even if I can’t do the exercises properly, I try my best.
I work on the trauma side, I did some courses on this side, I do various therapies. I still have a lot of work to do, but I know and I can see that it is helping me.
I do constant breathing exercises, meditation, showing gratitude.
Everything became a process, of which, in 5 years, I can say that I took the first step. Like an EKG trace. I am aware that many others follow. But giving up is NOT an option.
There can be many causes to a disease. Which one do you think have triggered yours?
In my case, I think it was potentiated even before I was born. The situation was favorable for this, alcoholic Dad, denying all his life that he had a problem with alcohol – the genetic part very active. Born prematurely, unwanted, to a mother not even 16 years old, weighing less than 1kg at birth, “living” in a glass globe for the first 6 months of life.
Things continued into my childhood, where I began to drink more or less occasionally, among the many days of working side by side with my father, in a physical and mental stress difficult for a child to endure. Cursed and made a fool day after day, permanently humiliated in ways hard to imagine, deprived of the life of a child. By today’s standards, I’d probably be in a foster center, and my father would have lost his parental rights. But then, during communism, there were many things tacitly accepted by society…
I left home at 18, came to Bucharest to study and hoped that things would be resolved. Unprepared in any way for adult life, I made all the mistakes I could make, and alcoholism put many more bricks in my life. Year after year, in a state of unconsciousness towards myself and towards those around me, I reached the bottom of the pit 5 years ago…
Until 5 years ago, all I tried was to always have a bottle of alcohol with me to help me in any kind of situation. For him, the mighty alcohol, I lost almost everything. Relationships, friends, family, health. I was left alone. The only person I have by my side now, from my life as an alcoholic, is my wife, to whom I am grateful for everything she has done for me. Before and after.
And I think that was the moment of true diagnosis.
The moment of realizing that I have a ruthless disease in front of me, “won” after a fight with myself and with the image of the persecuting father, which lasted over 40 years…
The moment when you realize that you have only 2 options: to give up alcohol and start a new life, no matter how hard it is, or to disappear. There is no middle ground.
And I chose to give up alcohol. I chose to do this and after 5 years I can say it was worth the effort. Even if it comes with many, many challenges.
Do you have an equilibrium by now? How does a day in your life look like, what do you eat and what is your lifestyle?
Equilibrium… It’s like tightrope dancing for me. It’s a word with many meanings to me. If before equilibrium meant a bottle with some alcohol in it to numb the being, fears, frustrations and failures, today I juggle among situations and experiences, among emotions and pains, among all kinds of inner voices and aspects of real life. At this point, I don’t know if I’m in the best position to talk about equilibrium.
It’s just that everyday, I’m grateful that the Universe gave me a new day in which I’m alive😊.
Daily I am grateful for those people that the Universe saw fit to appear in my life.
Every day I force myself to do as many of the things I set out to do and undertake to do, sometimes with a superhuman effort. And they more or less succeed. And I thank with gratitude for all that I have done.
Every day I try to be helpful to those who need me. And I help without judging.
Every day I direct my attention, as much as I can, to the things I have to improve in myself, reading, learning, participating in various seminars and courses, discussing.
Everyday, I put a small piece into becoming a better version of myself.
A famous quote that says something like this always helps me: To think healthy about you when you are surrounded by the appearance of disease, or to think you are prosperous when there is apparent poverty around you requires a lot of strength, but the one who acquires this strength becomes a MASTER OF THE MIND, he can defeat fate and have what he wants. – W. D. Wattles. I always turn to him when the pain becomes unbearable for days. When faith, hope and love are about to fall from their place because of my physical infirmities or because of material lacks. And even though I have my moments of weakness and helplessness, I get up and move on.
If from what I said above there is something that somehow resembles an equilibrium, we can also call it that…
The diet is very conservative. We eat the absolute majority home-cooked, very simple, no complicated recipes or with many ingredients, we gave up dairy altogether, and we eat meat only occasionally. No sugary or fizzy drinks and no alcohol.
What do you find the most difficult, talking about a healthy lifestyle and a functional life?
“Now, however, these three remain: faith, hope, and love; but the greatest of them is love.” 1 Corinthians 13:13
I know, you said one and I mentioned three. And I also put a quote😊.
It’s just that in the given context it seems relevant to me and somehow everything is interconnected.
I will take them briefly, one by one.
Faith that everything has a purpose, a meaning, most often beyond immediate understanding, for me personally creates a state that makes me go ahead and do the things that I know help me, even if physically or mentally I am blocked. I can stay like this for a while, but faith gives me the opportunity to recover.
The unwavering hope that the Universe brings things into my life that help me progress, even if they seem bad to me, keeps me aware and focused on solutions.
Love, towards myself, towards people and towards the Universe, creates the conditions for me to really see who I am, what I have to do on this earth and to remain grateful.
And that seems to me the hardest. To think healthy when I am surrounded by the appearance of illness, to have love for myself even when I cannot do even the smallest things, to love people as they are without judging them, to be grateful. And I think as long as I can do that my life will remain functional.
What advice would you give to people who have just been diagnosed with an autoimmune disease? How would you encourage them?
Over the past few years, I have talked to several autoimmune people. I have a wonderful autoimmune wife by my side (a.n. Renata, whose story you read a few weeks ago). Everyone is different. But I have not met anyone who received such a diagnosis calmly. Life changes. RADICAL. We need to take these changes into account. We need to be properly informed about the condition. We also started to have information in this spectrum, which helps us understand what is happening to us. If we haven’t had time for ourselves until now, we need to become much more present in our lives.
Healing in my view is a process that comes from the inside out. We cannot separate the soul from our body. We cannot separate physical ailments from emotional pain. They are all there, waiting to be healed. We need concrete solutions for this. It takes time and perseverance to find our own way.
The good news is that there is life after diagnosis. There are many examples of people who have been reborn.
If I had to say it all in one sentence it would sound something like this: Life doesn’t stop when you get a diagnosis, but when we accept its fatality. Refuse fatality, get informed, look for the right solutions, rewrite your life according to the new rules. May faith, hope and love not leave you.
